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The Tesla and SpaceX Kabuki
A meeting of their special merger committees
It’s time for an odd kabuki dance.
Those aren’t my words, by the way. They’re from the man himself, Elon Musk, CEO of both Tesla and SpaceX. He was describing how he can’t be involved when the recently formed special committees explore a merger between his two publicly-traded tech giants.
I had to look up what a kabuki dance was.
It’s apparently a classical Japanese dance-drama, but let’s be real here. In America, kabuki really means a show that’s put on when everyone already knows the ending.
Can you imagine the Tesla and SpaceX special committees doing this dance together?
Well, you’re in luck. Because I did. Each company name refers to their respective special committee.
Tesla: “Thanks for meeting with us guys. So you’ve had a taste of public markets for not even 6 months and you want to merge with us?”
SpaceX: “We were actually thinking of buying you. I mean, we’re really the future of SI. You know, Super Intelligence. We’re also bigger than you. Rockets, data centers in space, satellites. We almost ended the war in Ukraine, what have you done lately?”











