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Fake Love: Almost Romance Scammed

3 min read14 hours ago

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A couple of days ago I got a missed call from a number with a country code I didn’t expect, +23320*****60. A quick lookup showed the number is from Ghana. Out of curiosity I did a reverse phone number check but found nothing.

Then I thought, let me check the number on WhatsApp. It showed up as a real estate business account with a young lady as the wallpaper and the name Alissa Mcdonald. I checked the name and found it is associated with a renowned realtor based in Charlotte, North Carolina. However, the photo on the business account told a different story as it did not look anything close to the photos I found for Alissa. I did a reverse image search on the image and found similar photos on a Facebook account belonging to an Asian model.

That’s when it hit me, is this a romance scam? And that’s how the idea for this blog was born.

The whole thing also reminded me of an incident I handled a couple of years ago for a close relative who almost got romance-scammed.

My relative is a lady. The scammer portrayed himself as a South African man working with a logistics company in the Middle East. He said he was sending her some goodies but asked her to handle the clearance fees at JKIA. The parcel was already in the country. She later received a call from someone claiming to be from the logistics company with offices at JKIA. The lady on the phone demanded a certain amount of money before they could dispatch the parcel with a local courier.

Luckily, I knew someone who works at JKIA. We asked him to help us verify the offices. When we called the lady who claimed to be at the airport and asked for their office number, she disappeared. That’s how we saved my relative from fake love.

So, what exactly are romance scams and how can we protect ourselves? That’s what I want to share in this blog.

Romance scams are a type of social engineering attack where the scammer poses as someone looking for love. They use romance to gain your trust, and once they have it, they use that trust to con you. The story of my relative shows exactly how that built-up trust almost cost her money if she hadn’t involved me at the last stage when they were asking for the parcel clearance fees.

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This is becoming a big issue locally, and many people are falling for it. So the big question is: how can we identify these scams and protect ourselves?

How to Identify Romance Scams

  • Rapid Attachment (“Love Bombing”): The scammer professes deep love, calls you a soulmate, or talks about marriage within days or weeks of meeting.
  • Moving Off-Platform Early: They quickly push the conversation off the dating app or social media onto encrypted apps like WhatsApp, Telegram, or normal text.
  • Excuses to Avoid Meeting in Person: They claim to live or work far away, often saying they’re in the military, on oil rigs, on construction projects abroad, or working with international NGOs, and always have an emergency that prevents a real-life meeting or even a proper video call.
  • Manufactured Emergencies: They ask for money with promises to pay you back, citing medical bills, travel costs, frozen bank accounts, or legal trouble.
  • Unusual Payment Demands: They request money through wire transfers, reload/gift cards (Amazon, Google Play, iTunes), or cryptocurrency.

How to Protect Yourself

  • Never Send Money: Do not send cash, gifts, bank details, or crypto to anyone you have only met online or on the phone.
  • Do a Reverse Image Search: Check their profile pictures using reverse image search tools to see if the photos belong to someone else or are linked to a different name.
  • Go Slowly: Ask specific, probing questions about their daily life, local background, and history. Listen carefully if your friends or family point out red flags.
  • Insist on Live Video: If they continuously refuse video calls or keep making technical excuses, cut off contact immediately.

If you suspect you are being scammed, stop all communication right away, report the profile to the platform, and contact your bank or the relevant authorities.

Stay sharp out there. Fake love is expensive.

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Joseph Kilatya
Joseph Kilatya

Written by Joseph Kilatya

Every contact leaves a trace. - Dr. Edmond Locard