10 Reasons This List Won’t Go Viral

Michael G. Barilleaux

5 hours ago

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A preliminary diagnosis

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1. It’s not about A.I.
2. It doesn’t involve tips for passive internet income
3. It’s interesting rather than routine
4. It actually isn’t interesting at all, it’s just another stupid list
5. I wrote it while sipping Nyquil straight from the bottle
6. It wasn’t generated by A.I.
7. It was inspired by the Loch Ness Monster
8. It isn’t political in nature
9. The best comedians are all dead
10. My writing doesn’t suck, people just don’t read anymore, duh.