The Sad Reality Behind “Twin Flame” Romance
[my writings on Medium are entirely theoretical and based on personal experience]
Today I was on Quora and noticed that a retired teacher named Jeanette O’Neil posted the following answer to a “twin flame” reunion question:
“The chaser will never really reach union with the runner. I read of a false testimony yesterday of union. It was boastful and a denial of reality. The runner is a self-alienated narcissist wearing a mask and possessed by the Jezebel narcissist demon spirit. This person totally has the chaser manipulated thinking that they love them but always pulling the rug out beneath them picking fights and creating drama dangling a carrot that can never be held and eaten. The runner is always aloof withholding love and true intimacy and promising a deeper love which can never be felt or experienced.
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Why does the chaser never catch onto the tricks and maneuvers? It is because they had a parent like this as a child whom they had to chase for love that they could never get. The parent would pull the chaser into their space by the love bombing and then push away. This is what happens with the chaser in adulthood. They idealize aloof narcissists. They have pushed all mean narcissistic behavior far away in themselves deciding to be a codependent who is forever kind and loving but set up this polarized part of themself far away that becomes like a magnet drawing narcissists like the runner into their orbit and aura. The narcissist runner decided as a child to be a narcissist pushing all codependent and weak characteristics far away from them to a shadow side creating a polarized magnet pulling codependents into their space and aura field.
Why don’t the chasers learn their lesson? The narcissist parent’s pulling in and then pushing away created the first trauma bond. Then the narcissist twin who does this same demonic thing creates a new trauma bond and reopens the wounds of the original narcissist parent who created these core childhood wounds. It takes much effort to truly get this on multiple psychological and spiritual levels. There were other catalytic boyfriends who had also done this previously to the chaser but never to this extent as the diabolical demonic twin flame runner who truly is a bat out of hell.”
I love statements like this because they demystify supernatural phenomena. The fact is: narcissists and codependents DO fall for each other all of the time. And very frequently, one Biological Other may be a narcissist and the other Biological Other may be a codependent.
When I met my Biological Other she was very much posessed by the “Jezebel Narcissist Demon Spirit.” But instead of enabling her, I called her out on it. This led to both of us pausing to restructure our lives separately. This led to both of us reevaluating our present situation post-pandemic.
I like to think that we exorcised each other. But that is too strong of a word. We refused to enable each other. I declined to provide my other with narcissistic supply. And she refused to allow me to be codependent. This led me to realize that my Biological Other is my relative; just like my Biological Mother, Biological Father, and Biological Child.
