Keep Yourself Detached from People at Work
The workplace is a place where we should focus on achieving something that contributes to our growth and future. We should build connections with people in a way that helps us learn, improve, and move towards our goals.
But at the same time, I feel that it is important to stay emotionally detached from people at work.
This does not mean that we should avoid people or not have good relationships with our teammates. We can still talk to them, help them, have lunch together, participate in team activities, and even become good friends. But we should not become so emotionally dependent on them that their presence becomes necessary for us to feel comfortable at work.
When we become too attached to people at work, we slowly get into a comfort zone. We start expecting certain people to always be around us, support us, help us, or understand us. We may also start feeling that the team we are currently working with will always remain the same.
But the workplace does not work that way.
People move between teams. Projects change. Managers change. Priorities change. Sometimes, even when you have done nothing wrong, you may suddenly find yourself in a completely different situation.
And that is when you understand the importance of being emotionally independent.
Especially when all your teammates are together and suddenly you are the only one who is moved to a new team without anyone’s support or help, it can hurt more than you expect.
You may be a junior. You may not know much. You may still be learning how things work. And then you are placed in a separate team and asked to lead and work independently.
That situation can make you question yourself.
You may wonder why you were chosen. You may feel that you are not capable enough. You may compare yourself with the people who stayed behind and think that they are in a better position because they still have each other.
But sometimes, the situation is not about your capability at all. It is simply how things happen in a workplace.
This is also where we learn that people may not always be able to give us the same empathy that we give them.
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When everything is going well, it is easy to feel connected to people. We spend time together, discuss work, share jokes, complain about things, and help each other. It can feel like we are all in the same situation.
But when circumstances change, everyone has their own priorities.
The people we thought would always be there may not be able to support us in the way we expected. And that can be painful if we have become too emotionally attached to them.
I think this is why we should learn to maintain a healthy distance.
Be friendly. Build connections. Learn from people. Help your teammates when you can. Celebrate their successes. Have good conversations with them.
But also learn to be comfortable on your own.
Do not make one team, one person, or one group of people the reason you feel secure at your workplace.
Because teams can change.
People can leave.
You can be moved to another project.
And you may suddenly have to start everything again with a completely different group of people.
The ability to adapt to that change is important.
Work is only one part of our life. The people we meet at work can teach us many things and some of them may even become lifelong friends. But we should not forget that our journey does not depend entirely on them.
Build relationships, but don’t lose yourself in them.
Be connected, but don’t become dependent.
And most importantly, learn to stand on your own even when the people you are comfortable with are no longer around.
