Age-Gap Relationships
3 min readOct 6, 2026
- Please stop telling young girls that they are so mature for their age that their only option for marriage is someone older than them. Please.
- I believe that there are very rare instances where two people can be far apart in age and be in a loving, healthy relationship. Otherwise, it is always a red flag when an older individual attempts to lure a young person into a relationship with them – especially when it is a pattern for them to do so. The opposite (a young person pursuing someone much older than them) is a red flag as well as, unless there are other factors involved, this is often a sign of past trauma.
- The attempted flattery of “yOu ArE sO mAtUrE fOr YoUr AgE” (FYI, I typed it that way on purpose because I am being hostile :D ) that often accompanies an older individual targeting a young person will often QUICKLY devolve into “you are so immature” and/or “our age difference is too much of a problem” and/or attempting to make you feel inferior to their peers (especially those who share your gender) once they realize they cannot control you.
- The likelihood of a young person in this kind of situation being replaced as they start to get older themselves is very high – which says volumes.
- There is no excuse for preying on someone younger than you.
- The closer I get in age to the ages of men who have targeted me this way, the more disturbing their behavior reveals itself to be because when I look at someone who is the age that I was when those men made advances toward me, all I see is someone who is practically a CHILD – someone who I have absolutely NOTHING in common with romantically and the thought of trying to date them feels PREDATORY (cause it is :D ). Mind you, I say all this in the context of older adults making advances toward young adults. Don’t even get me started on adults targeting MINORS (or do :D ).
- It is shameful (and criminal) how people turn a blind eye to adults making predatory advances/comments toward children. It is shameful how they are brushed aside as harmless, playful and even flattering. Older men openly making comments about how attractive a teenage girl is is UNACCEPTABLE. Adult women lusting after young boys and commenting on how handsome they are going to be when they get older is UNACCEPTABLE. Anything similar to these things is also UNACCEPTABLE.
- Young people, please don’t ignore the people who warn you about the dangers of age-gap relationships especially when it comes from someone in the same age group as the person targeting you.
- It is NOT flattering to be pursued by someone way older than you. Do not let anyone convince you that it is.
- Young people are not trophies, they are human beings created in the image of God.
- These relationships often begin and exist in secrecy. No relationship like this (whether it is one that involves a large age gap or not) has anything good to add to your life. If you are being told or encouraged in any way to keep a relationship a secret, leave it!!!!
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