may mararating kaya ako sa buhay?
There’s this question that’s been on my mind lately, especially during the times when I feel uncertain about college — may mararating kaya ako sa buhay?
I know we cannot fully predict the future, but it would still be reassuring to at least have an idea of which road to follow or the destination we look forward to reaching.
After everything that has happened, after every plan that did not work out — it has become hard for me to imagine my future.
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Because what if, what if it turns out the same way again? What if I fail to turn these new plans into reality, just like before? Will it still be worth it to plan the next chapter, or should I just go with the flow?
Who I am today is vastly different from who I was a few months ago. Back then, I hadn’t fully accepted everything yet. I kept grieving over what I had lost without realizing how much I continued to lose along the way.
And now, after a heavy sigh, I’ve finally accepted it. My path has taken a turn in a direction I’m unfamiliar with, but one I have to be brave enough to face. The places I go to and the people I see are different now. I’m still uncertain, but at least I have the courage to keep going.
My future is still unclear to me, but I want to choose to believe. The direction may have changed, but my heart is still beating for the same future I never stopped imagining.
This path may not be where I once envisioned myself, but I want to believe. I want to believe that no matter how long the journey takes or how many stopovers I have to make, where I’ll eventually end up will be a place where I feel most alive.
Hindi pa man ako sigurado kung may mararating ako sa buhay, pero kung saan man ‘yon, sana sa lugar kung saan talaga ako nararapat.
