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Devils in my Head
PART ONE: 2013
I’ve been a Motörhead fan since 2013. I got into the band late — there’s no denying that. I blame The Walking Dead, specifically the episode No More Sorrow. There’s a moment where Merle Dixon sits alone in a stolen car, bourbon in hand, Motörhead blasting through the speakers. The song is Fast and Loose.
I was nineteen at the time, always hunting for new music, and completely mesmerized. I remember thinking: Who the hell is this band? I’d never heard anything like it before.
I had to hear more. Knowing the song came from Ace of Spades, I figured that was the place to start. From there, it spiralled. Once Motörhead got its hooks into me, that was it. I needed to hear every album, every song. I wanted to understand the band, the sound, the man behind it.
Before long, Motörhead became my refuge — the place I went when I felt entirely out of place in the world. Their music helped me disappear into my own head, letting my thoughts wander. I’d imagine what it must feel like to be onstage like Lemmy, belting those songs out at full volume. Who cares if I lost my hearing? I’d be having the time of my life.
Music had always been that refuge for me. It may have had something to do with my Autism diagnosis. I know that whenever I listened to music, I would daydream in vivid images. The visual imagination was definitely part of my Autism.
I’m not much of an instrumentalist. I can play a bit of bass, and I’ve dabbled with guitar, but I’m nothing…
