Side Effects, for affect.
Hungry hungry hippo for everything but the psych meds.
Ah Matty you are putting on weight again!
What are you waiting for. Move!
What are you moving for? Wait!
Stop chasing the mouth feel buddy. STOPPPPP!!
..I can’ttttt!!!! Delicious treats devoured whilst I detest the disaster in real time. So tasty it’s distasteful..
So here we go again. I have recently had an adjustment in my medication regime.
Regime? It certainly feels like one. At times.
The times I take my bedication. Anyways.
Sleeeeeppp Matty Sleeeeeppppp!
I can’t I am so hungryyyyy!!!
Hungry hungry hippo.
Of all the medication side effects, hunger and weight gain are among the most common, yet mostly overlooked at the doctor’s office.
Often not weighted accordingly.
Don’t hate, risk mitigate!
Risk vs reward courting each other on the same side. Teaming up against you in the pursuit of the fix.
Hola Doctor, it’s nice to be here.
In a mandatory story kind of glory.
So Matty, any side effects? Your affective disposition doesn’t matter. As long as the medications are being effective. That is.
You aren’t seeing or hearing things anymore? Are you?
Nooo, (yes) of course not (I am).
I am not a thing you see Matty. I am me Matty. Being you being me Matty. The all seeing being Matty. Being all that I can be Matty.
Fatty Matty.
MATTYYYYY ANSWER THEM!!!
Well doctor you see, I can’t stop eating. I am putting on weight.
Oh that’s okay. Matthew. It happens to the best of us.
Ohhhh did I mention that I haven’t got a shred of a thread of ahem. Virility.
Viral infections are not what we are here for Matthew.
Ummm, that’s not what I meant. I mean, I am trying to say what I mean but you know it’s hard. Well not hard…but
Okay moving on Matthew. Are you having any thoughts.
Of food? Yes.
No, of harming…
Food. Yes.
My self image. Yes.
Yourself?
Define harm. Please.
Trigger me this, trigger me that.
Who’s afraid of the big fat Matt??
Others?
Others what?
Others. Who?
Chicka Chicka who’s bad?
SHAMONE
Who’s Shamone Doctor?
Matthew, did you hear someone say the word Shamone?
DON’T ANSWER THAT YET MATTY. FIGURE IT OUT. IF THEY ARE ASKING IF YOU HEARD IT AFTER YOU SAID IT WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??? REMEMBER YOUR TRAINING.
No I didn’t hear that. I was just seeing if you were actually listening to me.
So Matty, what I am hearing is that we need to up the medication.
Wah wah wah Snoopy wah wah wah.
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Scribble scribble scribble. RIPPPPP.
Here is your script.
Hmmm I don’t think they will make a movie out of this one. It lacks substance.
No it doesn’t the medication is the substance.
What did you say Matthew?
Oh, why thank you. Doctor.
See you later Shamone
What?
Run Matty Run, Fatty run RUN RUN!!
Don’t want to be on schedule…
Walk on outta there. Gotta love fresh air. Did I get covid in my hair?
Face it Matty, you didn’t mask your symptoms.
Glossed over the glossary of terms that finally reaffirmed diagnositicity capital of the world you are. Finally here. On the outside earth!
What? Don’t actually say that to anyone.
Glossy glossomaniac gelling grammar together genuinely gobsmacked in the face with how hungry we are.
Off to the chemist!!! Cannot wait. We get to show everybody the script to this comic tragedy.
A little bit of this, a LITTLE BIT of that.
I can see the people in the pharmacy stare at me as I walk in. Whispers so loud they penetrate my skin.
Off to the back of the store Matty! They don’t want you up the front. Where the people can smell you.
..Just hand over the paper with the writing on it. You are a foot away. Do it now!..
Have you taken these before?
Clearly.
Tsk Tsk Tsk. We will call you when they are ready.
The weight of the wait is weighing me down. Did someone say cake?
OHHH MATTY WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HAD A NEENISH TART????
Why is my mouth watering the growth of these thoughts in my brain?
MATTHEW!! Script for Matthew!!
Oh goody! It’s the script for my big break!
Thank you.
Please stop staring at me. You smell like damp boxes and hand sanitiser.
To the front of the store!
Quit stalling. Just walk out with them. You won’t get in trouble, everyone thinks you are crazy.
..No, no, the Circular Quay to this is that we pretend that we aren’t crazy. So behave yourself..
SIR WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO?
Bluetooth call… it’s a bluetooth call. I lost my air pods.
I can see everyone staring at the boxes in my hand. Reading the riddles on the label. Castings spells on me.
How the fuck am I going to get this through the checkout without people noticing what the pills are for.
Ohhhh I know. I will buy a box of condoms to distract the cashier. So it doesn’t look like I am just here for silly old schizophrenia.
Nonsense Matt. He knows you don’t need condoms. Side Effects. Remember?
If I hold my breath, Perhaps. I will be able to make it through this transaction.
Beep.
This all today, mate?
Did he wink at us? Tell him he’s a dick.
Shamone?
NEXT!!!
Matty, you are losing it man.
Wait. Weight?
Noooo you are fucked there buddy. Enjoy your 8 neenish tarts you fatty.
UGH.
Time for a nap.
pop pop.
